Because, like your audience, I’m scared to say ‘no’, that’s why And the fact is, I need the work (pause) Frankly, I’d rather recycle garbage Yeah, that’s right.. and separate the glass from the paper. (pause) But Peaches, PLEASE! Don’t you see we’re the whole reason this damn film is being made at all and it should really be about that.. about the people we all grew up with. (pause) Why did I involve myself in the project? I’ll tell you why. Well, I’m not going to woo some stupid intellectual with a comprehensive justification of how and why this movie is worth seeing. (pause) No! If they don’t know Starsky & Hutch by now, fuck ‘em.. we’re OLD MEN, for Christ’s sake.

Stiller and Wilson are box office! (pause) Why? Because they’re young, that’s why (pause) No, no, no… the point is people want to be entertained so they don’t have to think.. and they want it fast. Stiller and Wilson have CHEMISTRY! OK, so what do I say that’s going to make them want to go out and buy tickets to this film? (pause) To see me? The idiot drops his keys under a seat and misses my whole scene (pause) Yeah, I know it’s only 40 seconds long. You be sure to give my regards to Paul.” “Sure thing.” “Oh, one more thing.” “What’s that?” “You can’t smoke in here.” “Why not?” “They’ll fine us. Sorry.” “No problem.” MANNY leaves, DAVID lights up and dials a number “Peaches? David.. David who? David Soul Right Look Peaches, I can’t do this shit anymore.

Who is this guy? (pause) OK, OK, I know it’s a big, important station… but look, it’s not our movie and anyway, he thinks I’m gay.. GAY, yeah. The questions are insipid, it’s six-fuckin’-30 in the morning, I’ve done 437 interviews in three days and I’m not going to do it anymore, OK? (pause) Well, call Starsky.. I mean, Paul. He hung up on you, huh? Can you blame him? (pause) Peaches, why should I be the one to make people think? What am I going to say? (pause) I know you’re trying to reach that audience but who thinks at 6.30 in morning? You do. it’s a real sensitive issue for a lot of our listeners.” “The phone?” “Oh sure.. in here This a local call?” “Yeah.

My mobile was stolen.” “But you’re Hutch, man.” “Shit happens.” “Sorry to ask about the call. It’s just that they charge me for anything out of the area code.” “No, no.. I’m calling the publicist Local.” “I’ll leave you to it then. And God knows, I don’t want any problems with Standards and Practices. They’re on us like flies, these days.” “Oh yeah, why’s that?” “My producer, Flo – she’s in the ladies right now – she’s the cousin of a woman who works in the White House.” “Really.” “Yeah. And you know how Bush feels about this sort of thing.” “Not a problem.